Searching for Clarity

As we begin the New Year, many of us have ideas of how we desire 2015 to “pan out.”  Maybe you have created a theme for the year or have listed out your desires.

Or maybe, you are finding yourself confused.

Either confused about how to actually manifest your desires…. Y’know, how to bridge the gap between where you are now and what you want to experience.  Or, confused about your desires overall.

There are so many messages blasted at us throughout our lives.  Fall in love, get married, have children, work hard, save money, travel, etc.  Oftentimes, we think we know our desires, but as we walk towards them, we find ourselves quite uncertain.  We begin to questions whose desire this is we are chasing after – maybe it was your Mother or Father’s dream, maybe it was your best friend’s desire.  It doesn’t matter whom it belongs to… the truth is, that it is no longer what your heart is yearning for.

And so we search for clarity.
And search.
And search.
It’s exhausting!

Sometimes, we even torment ourselves trying to get clear on what it is that we most want to experience.

I know I spent most of my 20’s in this space.  I remember many times looking at my life and feeling so sad and frustrated that my outer experiences were not matching my inner longings.  And so I would sit at my altar for long periods of time, speaking my heart.  Or I would have a session with an intuitive or ask friends what they thought I “should” do to create the life I envisioned.

I knew I wanted different.  But different wasn’t quite clear yet.

Here’s the truth, Sister.
You may not like this.
But, this is what I have learned and have continued to see as I work with clients.

bottomline

You are Loved by the Divine

I am not sure if it’s the colder weather and the pull to hibernate or the intensity of life shifts, but I seem to find myself curled up in my bed or on my sofa writing in my journal.  I am naturally giving myself time to reflect on my life and inner stories and let go of that which is no longer serving me.I have been hearing about a lot of deep inner inquiry and releasing happening from women around the world.  Part of this is “normal” as we come to the end of December and reflect on the past year.  AND, there are also very powerful Astrological happenings that are forcing us to transform.  It is likely that some of this is/will be uncomfortable, heart-aching, or even deeply painful.And yet, without growth, we generally wither away.  Growth is the necessary means to our happiness and desires.So, if you are feeling your emotions percolating right under the surface or you have been moving through anger, sadness, shame, or guilt, I share with you this writing that came through to me.

This is meant to be a reminder to you if you are struggling right now or feel alone.

bottomline

Finding your Why

When I work with my clients privately and even in my Flower Essence Practitioner Certification Program, I always ask for women to get clear on their WHY.

I can’t remember when I first learned about this, but it is such a valuable and simple practice.

For those of you on a healing path to emotional freedom, you must have a WHY.

Your WHY becomes your guidepost.

There is so much beauty and joy in emotional freedom.
On this path, your Essence is set free.
You create healthy and appropriate boundaries.
You speak your truth.
You prioritize your needs.
You make choices based on YOUR desires.

And mixed in with this liberation can be times of challenge.
When you feel into the times your father was emotionally absent and how that set you up to attract relationships of unavailability.
When you feel into the anger you have towards your mother who never listened to your needs.
When you feel into the betrayal of a lover who lied to you.

There can be a surge of anger, or even rage.  There can be a fountain of grief.  And it can be easy to fall into familiar patterns.  It can be “safe” to keep suppressing these emotions because they are so uncomfortable and even heart achingly painful

For a moment, you wonder if you can go “unconscious”.
You wonder if you can dismiss these feelings and will them away.

bottomline

A Holy Bow of Gratitude

You are Holy.

Yes, you in fact, are the Divine Feminine in form.

I know that life does not always make this easy to understand or feel.

But, sister it is true.

And I know that you have experienced fleeting moments of this.

When you place your toes at the Ocean’s edge and your hair caresses your neck through the grace of the Winds, you have felt Oneness.

When you held your baby for the very first time and your heart opened in a way you could never have imagined, you have felt the Goddess.

When you locked eyes with a beloved and realized that this person was going to take you on a blazing journey (either to burn you to ash or expand you in pleasure!), you have felt the Divine.

So, how can you have more of these remembrances (’cause I am pretty sure you want more)?

bottomline

What would you tell your 14 year old Self?

Every time I sit in circle with women or take on a new client, I hear many of the same longings.   At the core of who we are, we actually desire similar things in our lives.

And what I know to be true is that most of the time, it is the lens in which we are navigating through the world (our beliefs, conditionings, past hurts) that directs us in our choices.  So, if you are finding yourself not experiencing what your heart is envisioning, it is most likely because of something that happened in the past that has imprinted in your body or mind.  Although you might now be 27 or 45, your inner child is still wounded and her pains haven’t been addressed.

For a moment, imagine how you felt as a 14 year old.
Pause and reflect on how you entered “womanhood”… perhaps feeling different, misunderstood, fearful of intimacy, worried about being liked?
Think about how you felt around your friends and what you felt like in your body.

Have you taken time to address some of these issues and/or acknowledged their presence?

If you answered no, then my sister, those heart aches are still informing your present day life.

What if you took a moment and focused on your 14 year old self within?

In this month’s episode of WomanRising TV, I am inviting you to “reparent” your inner adolescent.  I believe that taking time to speak to your 14 year old self can actually shift how you are interacting with your children, your partner, your boss, your friends.

bottomline

Walking towards your Desires

Ahhhhh…. I am just re-emerging from the sacred container of the Wild Sacred Women Maui retreat.  There is so much present for me after being in Maui for 2 1/2 weeks and walking the beautiful path of Sisterhood during this retreat.

I truly want to share so much of it with you, and I also know that there is still so much integrating.

What I know to be true:

  • I fell in LOVE with the courageous women who said YES to this retreat.  My heart literally felt as though it might burst from this Love.
  • I was reminded of my Divine gifts that have been offered to me from Spirit.
  • Sisterhood is the salve that will heal many of our wounds.
  • Mother Earth is the sweetest nectar to remind us of our place on the planet… and for deep healing to occur within.
  • Getting away from daily routines is crucial for our continual unfoldment.

bottomline